My Peace of Mind

“OK, Grandma. So it’s this show about this crazy town in Louisiana that is FILLED with sex-crazed vampires and they all want Sookie’s blood. She’s a waitress and a fairy and a mind-reader. Some people call her a fang-banger, but those people are religious freaks. No offense. Her best friend Tara lives with a she-demon, who sometimes makes Tara’s eyes go all black, and the whole town has a huge orgy. Merry Christmas, Grandma, I love you so much!!”